Sitting at my desk at Corporate Lackey HQ and thinking how loooong this week feels. I started early and will be finishing late, and it has been a challenging, frustrating sort of day. And I have had lots of those in a row which sucks the life right out of me. But even given this, I have chosen to let this feeling of being at a crossroads sit with me for a while. I am struggling with feelings of guilt and failure around the idea of leaving. Because what will that say about me? So I am just marinating on it. And perhaps because of this non-decision, some exciting and crazy options have presented themselves. Things I would never have thought of or gone looking for. One option that would mean staying put, but also grabbing hold of a massive opportunity. Equally, three others outside of here that are pretty awesome. No real decision needs to be made right yet but the idea of choice is freeing. I am very conscious of running towards something I really want, rather than running away.
And the best part about all of this is having Science Guy on hand to pro-con list my through it all. And he’s organising dinner and entertainment* tonight. As well as offering to pick me up later so I don’t have to brave the cold, yuck night. Sweet.
*I have no idea what this means. It could be dirty.
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