So day four of life as engaged person saw me experience heart palpitations and a minor panic attack. What the fuck am I doing?! Why did I say yes?! The resultant congratulatory acts have led to a lovely card from colleagues. As well as a massive helium-filled balloon depicting two cuddly bears with ‘Happy Engagement!’ emblazoned across the top. It is currently floating above my desk. Menacingly.
My balloon ‘issues’ are part of a long-standing arrangement between me and my sub-conscious. Globophobia for me, isn’t a fear of the actual balloon, but the anticipation of them popping. I can’t bare small children within a couple of feet of a balloon, in case they bite it.
And now there is a bloody great un-banged bang, hovering over my work area. I can’t tell anyone in the office, lest I be taunted mercilessly by bastard colleagues. Crap. Science Guy has suggested I ‘man-up’. Sure.
What scares you, dear reader?
Beautiful balloons (in a field far, far away) courtesy of Rachel Dennys.
Comments
I am petrified of birds. On a trip to Christchurch earlier in the year, I went with a friend to visit Sumner and eat fish and chips on the beach, and it turned into my worst nightmare as we were mobbed by hungry seagulls. Bastards.
All my friends mock me, until they see me around more than a couple of sparrows, and then they understand that it is a real thing, and that I am actually afraid, not just a big drama queen.
Haircuts. Every time I need one, which is pretty often with short hair, I experience butterflies and trepidation because whatever I get I will have to live with for at least a month, and maybe even longer. And I’ve ended up with some doozies.
Moths … especially the ones here in NZ, with big bulbous, hairy bodies (shudder). Paradoxically, I’m not sure which makes me feel sicker, a live moth fluttering around the room, or a dead, squished one – the result of someone trying to “save” me. For years now, H has understood that he needs to get the disgusting thing out of the room, without harming it!
I worked with someone once who was afraid of styrofoam. Now *that’s* fucking wierd, if you ask me ;)
I know I’ve been busy, but I seem to have missed the engagement party!
So happy belated congratulations!
Fear of balloons. That’s a new one for me. I have to say that I’m not afraid of any one thing in particular. But when out (or standing by a window) in the dark of night, I think about all those scary movies I’ve seen in the past. Particularly the beast in “An American Werewolf in London”. What, that was 30 years ago and I still think of that in subways or in dark parks…
:-)
just read that old post of yours and, er, you must NEVER come to my house. The only thing on your list we don’t have by the bucketload is clowns. Which reminds me, a propos our conversation yesterday about Stephen King, I take it back, do not under any circumstances read It.
Me? Spiders. Utterly irrational. I nearly picked up a beautiful beetle the other day and then realised I’d miscounted the legs and it had eight. I nearly passed out.
I’m with science guy. HTFU.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unkIVvjZc9Y
(NSFW, tho really not that bad – just a lot of F word :) )
However, if it was clowns…. I’d be right there with ya.
Doctors. Hate going to the doctor. Will avoid at all costs.
I was terrified of popping or escaping balloons until my adolescence, and I still don’t like it when they burst, so I sympathise with your current emotions. I also refused to ride escalators until the age of around 15.
These days I try and avoid staircases (interior or exterior) that don’t have a rail I can walk alongside, although when I am on holiday it doesn’t seem to bother me as much. I am also very frightened of losing my footing while bushwalking to the extent that I usually take a walking stick with me.
Balloons for me too – I can’t speak for fear when near them. Also, daddy-long-legs, aka craneflies. Something about their dangly legs. Woodlice don’t frightne me but I find them wholly disgusting.
I’m scared of always loving someone who doesn’t, and has never, loved me
Maggots. I would cut off my leg rather than have it saved by their horrible wriggliness.
Balloons funnily enough, and clowns, and the foamy bits on the end of earphones….Also worms, slugs and snails. But no spiders. I quite like spiders :)
Many congratulations on being an engaged personage :D
Mountain lions and grizzly bears. I grew up in Montana, what can I say?